The Holiday Season is here

I can not believe how FAST this year has gone by. Yeah we say that every year but tomorrow is December 1st. Are you kidding me? I am pretty sure that the kids JUST started school. Wait that was in August...YIKES! PRESSURE.
What to do with the amount of pressure the holidays brings? I am not remaining vigilant to my cause, myself. I have moments of great accomplishment and then get so caught up in the everyday crap that I find I am loosing myself every few minutes and need to turn around and say...."Hey SELF, keep going. Get your ass moving and make sure you are taking care of yourself". 
I ADORE motherhood. I LOVE my children beyond measure. I can not imagine my life without the glorious madness that raising children brings. But you know there are some days where I find myself thinking, This was SO MUCH easier before I had babies. I do not recall staying in shape, eating well and trying to keep my 'sexy' going being this much fucking work. It also does not help my mojo or my motivation much that the man pays little to no attention to me and our relationship. But I will tell you, his neglect definitely makes me perk up all the more when another man pays any attention. 
A small flirt from another man, a 'hey sexy, how you doing', makes me feel yummy and realize that I am still desirable. Even if 'HE' forgets to pay attention like he should. Yeah go ahead and tell me that hearing adoration in your direction doesn't make a difference to your ego. Even if you feel everything in your life is 'perfect'.
Well enough of that. 
I know that being in my 40's is starting to hold great value to how I feel about myself. Both physically and mentally. Way more so than it use to. I think that I am just starting to really figure myself out and know what I want. So my focus is scattered as there is SO MUCH going on in my mind at any given moment.
Now to get through the holidays......My momentum. The new jeans I just bought myself that are a size smaller than I am now. The little red very FITTING red dress that is in my wardrobe that I want to wear on my 43rd birthday next May. My children, especially my daughters. What type of woman do I really want them to look at when they see me?
So this holiday season...The greatest gift I will be receiving is the one I give to myself. Acceptance, unconditional love, patience, perseverance, and determination.  
Tis the season........